Character Analysis: Nijimi Anazawa's anger issues

I would just want to add a particular trait of Nijimi Anazawa (Nijimin). I have already made her a character analysis but it would do injustice if I do not tell this one particular thing that I fail to emphasize in my character analysis of her. And that is her (Nijimin's) anger issue.

Though it was shown, it was never pointed out that it is her character flaw, only in her flash back was it clearly mentioned. Why is this something worth discussing? Somehow, in her fit of angers if there is something she couldn't do, i.e. moments of powerlessness, instead of venting her frustration towards others 'SHE IS BITING THE FINGER OF HER THUMB' to the point of it breaking.

Should there be an issue with it? With one who was given a very scary and awfully powerful 'stick,' it's only natural that it will be used without any hesitation with that certain character flaw of her. It would be easily to mass murder people, to easily manipulate everyone around her, to easily vent out all of her anger on anything but herself. But she didn't.

If it were were, I'd go on a rampage, 'kill yourself,' there and 'kill yourself,' there on any civilian, strangers, that I meet. I'd go on a killing spree just to get out the anger filling up inside of me. But she didn't.

The first time Nijimin showed her room apartment there were mind-controlled slave that were doing all the chores/house keeping in her home, she showed seemingly no hatred towards any of them. In my mind, only after thoroughly thinking about it, are these the same group of people that lead her father to take his life? But if I remember correctly, she stated that they were fans of her, or perhaps I am wrong. But of which case, she showed no ill will towards any of the slaves she have. Perhaps a facade she put for her newly found Magical Girl friends?

Perhaps she already exacted her vengeance on these people and her keeping them as slaves is making her life convenient. Is just that strategic? Or is she just emphatic towards them, to a point of instead of killing them, she kept them alive, just like what Tsuyuno Yatsumura did.

I guess, she was just that kind. She always wanted people around her to be happy all the time, anyway. So perhaps, these slaves of her aren't the people who did wrong to her family. Just some random fan, picked as tribute to her growing avatar of fame.

We can also say that what she's doing is like what Kosame Amagai is doing, cutting herself, but only it doesn't hurt as much. But I don't know, she showed no hesitation breaking her fingernails when she gets very mad, and she showed no pain or what so ever when her nail breaks.

Perhaps she's just that innocent, childish as one would say.

Still, she kept it all to herself, the burden she was carrying, the problem that was weighing her down: All her depression, all her misfortunes. And on her death bed, she died smiling. Her flashback, it seems, washed away all the negativity she had. In the end, she was happy. Or rather, she was happy in the end.. of her life.

---

"Nijimi Anazawa, you're going to die," a masked figure appeared in the peripheral of Nijimin. Time froze around her, she couldn't move. She was lucid. She heard this masked figure's voice. This stranger is telling the truth.

"Who... who are you? Are you a Magical Girl as well? Or are you an administrator?" Nijimin asked.

"I am neither," the masked stranger replied. "But, I'm curious. Interested in you, Nijimi Anazawa."

"Wha- Why can't I move?" Nijimin asked trying her best to move.

"Is that your wish?" the masked stranger asked. "Very well."

The masked stranger chanted a word and the whole room as well as her friend and the man she loved broke like shattered pieces of glass. They are in a different dimension.

"Where are we?" Nijimin asked as she tries to gain her composure.

"We're inside my Firefly Dimension. When I break this spell, you will meet your fate." the masked stranger answered.

Nijimin took a deep breath and pose a battle stance.

"Who are you?" Nijimin asked courageously.

"I'm... I guess you could say I'm a curious firefly," the masked stranger answered her as he took off his mask. A teary-eyed young man's face with no special feature but cold blue eyes. The curious firefly smiled as he wiped away the tears from his eyes. "Nijimi Anazawa, you will soon die once I break my spell. And I couldn't help but feel sorrow for you. You live the most unfortunate life among your small friends."

"My life? Most unfortunate? How do you know about me?" Nijimin asked.

"I just know," the curious firefly answered. "But that's only just the surface. What these eyes of mine could see.. But what I cannot is your heart.."

Nijimin stepped back. This man is a stalker, he must've have acquired some sort of magic stick and here I am with him, thought Nijimin. What is he going to do with me?

"I'm a curious firefly, that's all I'll tell you about myself," the firefly said.

And without realizing it. Nijimin tried to use her magic stick.

"Sit!" she ordered.

"Sit? If that's what you wished. But would like to sit as well?" the curious firefly asked. He swung his hand and from nothing came two nears. "I'll sit here, if that's fine with you."

Did I just used my powers against him? Nijimin thought. Then I must have gained my powers back. I... I can save everyone.

"You will save them all, but... but you won't be able to save yourself," the curious firefly said. He was reading her thoughts.

"What do you want?" Nijimin asked trying to make sense of what is happening.

"Please don't be alarmed. I am neither friend or foe but just curious about you. You may say I'm a fan of your," the curious firefly said. "But not of your songs and choreography. I'm a fan of you, Nijimi Anazawa."

"You're a stalker!" Nijimin shouted as she tries to cover herself. She was embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," the curious firefly said. "But... I just could help it. You live a tragic life, Nijimi Anazawa. You lost your father, you cut ties with your family... your best friend got killed-"

"How... how do you know about- Who are you?" Nijimin angrily asked.

"I'm sorry.." the curious firefly said.

"She... she was..." Nijmin tried to speak but her anger was getting the best of her. Suddenly, out of habit, she tries to bit of her nail but was immediately held back by the curious firefly.

"Please, Nijimi Anazawa," the curious firefly. "Please, calm down."

"Kill yourself!" Nijimin suddenly ordered.

"Is that what you want?" the curious firefly said as a floating dagger suddenly materialized beside him. "Why don't you do it yourself? Kill me, Nijimi Anazawa."

The curious firefly took the floating dagger, knelt and held the knife to Nijimin to take. Nijimin stepped back fazed of what was unveiling at that moment. Have I killed someone before? Of course I have...

"Do you really want to kill me?" the curious firefly asked. This person is a complete stranger and she is going to kill him.

 "I.. I just want to talk with you. Lend you my ears for a while before your curtain call. Let me rephrase what I said earlier, Nijimi Anazawa. I am not a foe... I am a friend," the curious firefly said.

"This is a trick, right? Your magic as well!" Nijimin conclude. "You'll stab me anyway once I give in to what you are saying."

The curious firefly then gently pressed the dagger on his chest. A small fountain of blood gently streamed down his chest.

"If I die now, there's a chance you wouldn't be able to save your friends," the curious firefly said as he swallowed the pain forming on his chest.

Nijimin was surprised by this revelation.

"Stop!" Nijimin ordered.

Why is this stranger concerned with me. Concerned with everyone. How does he know me, my past? Who is this... firefly? Nijimin thought.

"Why?" the curious firefly asked.

I couldn't kill him. He haven't done anything wrong. Why should I kill him? He just wanted to talk. All of the fans of Nijimin does, Nijimin thought.

Nijimin took the dagger and threw it away.

"Why?" the curious firefly repeated.

"I shouldn't be killing my fans," Nijimin answered and gave the firefly a smile. "I'm sorry. I guess I got-"

"Why are you smiling?" the curious firefly asked.

Suddenly Nijimin couldn't say anything. Why was she smiling?

"Your life is full of sorrow, betrayals after betrayals, you took a lot of things in, lose the precious things you loved the most. And here, once more, you are smiling. Your life is the very meaning of tragic. Yet you smile. I do not understand, Nijimi Anezawa. Is this a mask you wear, that... that silly smile of yours? Why are you smiling, Nijimi Anezawa?

I wish I could save you," the curious firefly said as he donned his mask once more.

"If I don't smile," Nijimin gently spoke. "I cannot bring smile to others."

"But you're not happy," the concerned firefly said. "You are sad, right? Why bother yourself with others? It won't make your life better."

"Tell me, firefly," Nijimin said. "Will I be able to save my friends?"

"I wish to save you," the concerned firefly said. "But I couldn't. All I could do is cry for you. You lived a very sorrowful life and still hide it all in. I don't understand you. You are in pain, still all you want is everyone to be happy. I... I don't understand. You are considered as an unfortunate soul yet... you are giving... you are doing your best to keep it in. To keep it all in. Please..."

The firefly took off his mask to wipe his tears. Beneath his mask he was crying.

"I'm sorry..." the firefly said. "I don't want you to see me crying. Even though that's what I really good at."

"I've told you my answer, didn't I," Nijimin said. "If I don't smile, I can't make those around me smile. I'm a bit selfish but... that's it. I don't care about what happened or what's to happen. All I want is to make everyone happy."

"Is it alright with you?" the curious firefly asked to which Nijimin nodded.

"I'm Nijimin, after all, an idol, or rather an ex-idol, in Puppy Play, also a Magical Girl," Nijimin bravely said.

Suddenly, Nijimin found herself in a running pose in front of Kaname.

"I.. I weep for you Nijimi Anazawa," the firefly said. "You will save everyone but... you will die." The firefly suddenly broke to tiny pieces like that of broken glass.

She was speeding towards Kaname. But he suddenly noticed her.

---

I wanted to make a character analysis of Ayapi and Tsuyuyu but I'd guess that'd be for the next post. My apology if this fan scene didn't capture what you wanted to imagine.