I apologize, foremost, for I have no confidence that this post will do justice for what I want to discuss. I'm sleepy at the moment, I'm on a deadline and yet here I am wanting to type this little topic. It might even be not worth writing as it's perhaps already generally known but I still want this written.
During the third Kanto War, when most of the Promoters as well as Initiators are injured and are remedied in a clinic, Enju was helping around. Not by doing medical stuffs but by being with the people who needs somebody to cling on. She held hands of Promoters who are in pain, she helps everyone she sees. When Sensei Sumire saw how little Enju fares, she complimented her. How the initiator, just a little girl, can keep up her mental fortitude while her promoter is being childish and such.
I do believe the one to blame here is Rentaro Satomi.
Right from point the two met, Rentaro wanted to give Enju the life of a little girl. He never saw her as a tool, but only just a child. And he wanted her to live a normal life. When push comes to shove, it happened thrice, Rentaro hides the certain reality the live in to Enju. It was his way of saving her. She couldn't bear the reality they live in. People die, a certain thing the little children should not realize too early in their lives. He doesn't want them to see it all. To him, the world is cruel but he will make it beautiful for those little children.
Here lies Rentaro's prejudice. He sees the Cursed Children not as tool but as innocent children. Is it not wrong? To hide the reality of the world to their young mind? She couldn't bear to see it, he thought. He always thought... But he didn't realize that it was him who couldn't bear to see them cry.
They are too young. He is too kind. Their heart shouldn't bear it. Bear this certain reality they live. He couldn't bear it. For her sake, he lies. He hides the truth from her. But she knows. She knows it all. She knows his concern for her. That is why he lies. She knows the world is cruel, but she also knows he is trying to make it beautiful.
He did it a lot of times:
He gave her a warning shot in order for her to run away. They couldn't beat their enemies, if they continue so, they both will die. He told her to run away as he took the brunt of it all. He couldn't see her go, he'll do anything for her.
When Enju took a diagnostic exam, her evaluation was critical. When she asked Rentaro how did she do with the test, he lied. Everything was going to well. He didn't want to believe the reality the live in. He lied. But I know Enju knows. He lied for her sake.
When they were supposed their class one last time before the battle with the giant monster, immediately Rentaro realized what had happened. He tried to take her away from the truth by holding her back. But against her, he couldn't. He was broken as he heard Enju cry. Her classmates, her friends, Cursed Child just like her, killed. Was it not enough that Rentaro have to bear the images of his students corpse but as well hear his precious Enju cry?
He punched Enju on her gut to knock her unconscious. If he hadn't done so, she will stay with him and die. He couldn't bear Enju dying. He'd prefer sacrificing himself than see anymore of his precious friend suffer. He couldn't bear to see Enju suffer. He didn't want to lose Enju.
When the match between the Tendo sibling ended, Rentaro ordered the two children to not look back. He knew what happened. The reality they live in and the lie he believed. He shared with the children. He lied. The beautiful world is a lie.
But I'll say it again, I believe Enju knows. She knows what Rentaro was doing. She knows it was all for her sake. She knows that even he believed in a lie he made, it was all for her. If she breaks down just for a bit, that certain lie will certainly be the death of Rentaro. Sh had to stay strong for him. Even though she knows the beautiful world is a lie. Even though she knows the world is cruel. She mustn't falter. He loves Rentaro dearly. Even if he sees her only just a child, she understands him.
That prejudice that Rentaro keep towards the Cursed Children being only little innocent children. That lie Rentaro keep towards everyone losing hope as well to himself. It was all that had made the world beautiful for the Cursed Children, especially for our little Enju.
That certain prejudice that sees the world in a child's eye. No malice, only kindness and a certain blindness to the cruelty of the world. Its what that had kept it all. And when Rentaro forgot it all, a certain choice of word of Enju pulled him back. Slowly the cruel world has once more turned beautiful.
He cried as he held her tighter. Only was it then that he realized the fear he didn't want to be, has already become himself. And only in that realization that he can still come back.
~/_ ~
I wonder what the second season will be like..
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